Wisdom from Hollywoodland: Be real, not perfect.


Just a few weeks ago, quickly after returning to Hollywood after the holidays, I got an audition for a pilot that I went to. The audition went just fine, not much feedback, nothing special. But even after many years of devoting my life to this strange world, it will always feel a bit odd to show up, ready to audition for a job, only to see a huge line of girls who…

Look exactly like me…
Brown hair…
Brown or hazel eyes…
All alternating between shifting glares at each other, staring at their iPhones, or looking at the sides.

This happens regularly and often, as it is simply how this industry works. Last week I tagged along with my fiance, as he had an audition in Beverly Hills. I sat in the car and waited for him to be finished. As I sat there people watching, another audition was also going on in that building. My eyes watched as girl after girl exited this building…all wearing black jeans, black jackets, black high heals, and big, long dark hair. The interesting part of my people watching was that anytime two of these girls would see each other, they would look each other up and down, and then almost instantly start looking in the reflection of a car window, fixing their hair, adding more lipgloss, adjusting their clothing.

The more we strive to fit a mold, we lose ourselves. We become more and more insecure the more we feel we are all the same. How much pressure, it truly is, to have to be the most beautiful of the 100’s of brunette, tall, model/actors wearing the exact same thing.

Now, I love LA, as God has called me to be here, and I adore acting and being a part of this industry. Feeling that sense of competition is just something that comes along with the territory of choosing this line of work. As young women, it doesn’t matter if you are in the entertainment industry or not. No matter where you live, what you do, or who you are, we will all sometimes feel insecure and compare ourselves to each other.

There is a way, however, to overcome this difficulty that we face. In those moments of doubting ourselves, we are lacking integrity. We so easily forget our worth, value, and the truth about who our creator designed us to be…women who are strong, unique, and wonderfully made.

When I see the girls on Pinterest with super fit bodies and huge boobs, the enemy creeps into my head and plants lies about how I won’t be a “hot enough wife.” When I see girls at auditions who are taller, skinnier, bustier, more glamorous, better at doing makeup, have thicker hair…it is so easy to grow weak and weary and slowly let go of God and hold onto culture. My incredible fiance often boosts my confidence when my human female insecurities kick in. He constantly reminds me that he loves me for who I am…tiny, natural, messy bun, yoga pants girl. And I remember that God loves that girl…God created that girl.

We waste so much time investing in our insecurities, fears, and comparisons that we don’t invest in the girls God actually made. The next time you find yourself frustrated as you scroll through the many female bodies on Pinterest, turn your eyes away from that and turn your eyes to God’s truth. The next time you are walking and suddenly lose your stride of confidence because you see another girl who you feel you must compare yourself to, walk securely with integrity. Hold your head up high. Remember that there is only one you…and you were born to be real, not perfect. If we were perfect, there would be no need for God or His incredible grace. He never asked us to be perfect, so don’t ask yourself to be.

To the world, you might be right…you might never be enough. I know I’ll never live up to every single unrealistic expectation and pressure that our culture demands.

But our almighty God, our savior, our creator…it is written that He says we are enough.

You are enough.

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