5 Perks of having girl friends (a post I NEVER thought I’d write)

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I had this incredible moment today and almost didn’t recognize my own life. I realized that on Monday, I had a lovely coffee date with one of my girl friends. Then, on Wednesday, I had my usual hangout with  my best friend (we get together every Wednesday morning). Wednesday night was a girls night with 4 of my amazing gals. And this morning, I went to another girl friend’s place to hangout and have a dance lesson.
Maybe this week sounds completely normal to you, but if you knew me at all, you’d know how wildly different this is from my “usual.”

I didn’t have many girl friends growing up. I have an older brother, and just always found it easier and more comfortable to hangout with guys. They’re more laid back, they don’t cry as often, and they don’t even notice if you wear the same shirt 2 days in a row! Especially in middle & high school, I felt that every time I became friends with a girl, some sort of crazy drama would erupt. Either that, or they just had no interest in hanging out with me at all. As I moved out to LA at age 17, I was in an awkward place…not officially an adult, but definitely not a kid anymore. Making girl friends was so difficult, and I found that most girls my age already had their “best friend” and had no need to add another random girl to the mix.

Just last year I began noticing things about myself. My love of cooking…making things beautiful…watching chick flicks…lighting candles. All of these little things started to add up, and I realized how alone I was in a world without girl friends. My boyfriend is amazing, but he isn’t a girl (thank goodness). As much as he loves me, and would do anything with me, it’s just not the same as having a gal pal. I prayed and prayed for so many years that God would send me girl friends who truly loved me. Friends that I could have forever. Friends that I could do life with. To be completely honest, I thought that might be one of my most unrealistic prayers of all time. It seemed impossible.

I had gone so many years without girl friends. So many years doing life alone. Even living alone in my studio apartment for 2 years, I found comfort in my isolation. It was familiar to me, and I didn’t expect it to change.

All fears and doubts set aside, I decided to lead a girls connect group last fall through my church. I didn’t expect to gain much from the experience…I just felt called to do it. That decision has changed my life. I know have a girl I can call my best friend who I meet with every Wednesday. I never thought I’d find someone like that in flaky LA. Even better-God has completely orchestrated the timing perfectly, and we will be room mates in March.
I now have this incredible, strong core group of girl friends who consistently make an effort in our friendship and hangout with me on a weekly basis. I can’t even begin to tell you how life changing it is to have people to do life with.
Having girl friends has given me a room mate…a friend who teaches me dance…friends who check in on me…friends who love me for me.

If you’re like me and have either had an extremely difficult time making good girl friends OR just avoid having girl friends all together, take a look at the perks of having gal pals!

5 Perks of Having Girl Friends:

1-Accountability
I have an incredible group of girls who love me for who I am, and constantly push me and remind me of who I want to be.

2-Sympathy
My friends laugh uncontrollably when my jokes aren’t funny, and are heartbroken for my worries (even when they aren’t big at all).

3-Affirmation
Having girl friends means having people who make your day. God put girl friends in our lives to build each others’ self esteem and confidence. Just this week, one of my girl friend’s told me my skin looked so pretty she said it looked airbrushed. I immediately busted out laughing. My skin is one of my BIGGEST insecurities. After a week of stress and unexpected break outs, my girl friend made every insecurity disappear. I left feeling better about myself because of her.

4-Sisters
I have an amazing older brother, but he is my only sibling. I never got a chance to experience what it would be like having another girl my age around all the time. Having girl friends in your life is like having sisters! I have created an entirely new family out here in LA, and I am now blessed to have amazing sisters.

5-Fun!
I honestly don’t think anything is better than a girls night. Giggling. Talking. Eating. Watching chick flicks. Hanging out with my girl friends is SO fun! (Wow…I never thought I’d say that)

If you are like me, you might be afraid. Don’t let your fear of getting hurt stop you from making girl friends. And if you’re bitter or jaded, just let go. It’s worth it.

Tonight, I find myself enjoying a lovely night in alone. I’m drinking hot cocoa, and watching a chick flick…and girl friends are the reason I love these silly things! 🙂

*Want to join in on this topic? Leave a comment about your favorite things to do on girls night!
One of my best girls nights was when my friend Erica brought over cookie dough. I was too lazy & impatient to bake, so we both grabbed spoons & ate it straight from the container!*

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4 Comments Add yours

  1. Jobe says:

    You’re very right! Girlfriends are an extreme encouragement and a gift from God. I’m glad God has placed women in your life in the last few years! I also hope everything works out with you and your bestie. When my bestie and I moved in together a couple years ago, the experiences we shared were great but it also led to a huge falling out that took six months for God to heal and work in our individual lives. I caution you to figure out as much as you can about boundaries and your living styles before moving forward. Have a blessed week! 🙂

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and encourage me! 🙂 And thank you for your advice, as well. I’ve actually lived with friends before and it didn’t work out. Luckily, I’ve learned from my experiences & mistakes, and my friend & I have been communicating and making sure we’re on the same page which is an incredible blessing. I’m sure you’ve learned from your experience, as well, and will have incredible living situations from here on out! 🙂

      1. Jobe says:

        I’m glad to hear it. And you’re right, I learned a thing or two myself. 😉 Have a great week!

  2. Beth Sanchez says:

    I found myself in a very similar situation…oddly similar. I loved this story so much and you’ve inspired me to put my own into words. I am also going to share this with my sisters. Thanks for posting this and I’m so glad I stumbled upon it.

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