I found myself unable to sleep last night, which happens to us writers pretty often. My brain starts spinning…going in a million different directions. Praying about the things God has put on my heart, pondering these fires of passion inside of me, caused me to become even more overwhelmed. Even worse, I became discouraged.
If I can be completely candid with you, sometimes I feel really small. Life makes me feel so tiny. The same God that created this entire universe…the sun, the stars, even some of the most incredible people in history…that God created…me?
Sometimes I feel so sure of what God is calling me to do that I could just explode. I am overjoyed with the dreams I have on my heart, but I have come to realize (after 21 years of walking the earth) that these dreams are so much bigger than me. The more I realize how the job God has called me to do is much greater than I will ever be, the more I question why God would want me to do these things at all. What I often forget is that the entire point of our relationship with God is faith & trust. There is a passage in Romans that reminded me of this:
“If you see that a job is too big for you, that it’s something ONLY God can do, and you trust Him to do it-you could never do it for yourself, no matter how hard you worked-trusting Him to do it is what gets you set right with God, by God. This is a sheer gift.”
Light bulb moment! Aha! My dreams are much bigger than me-true. I can’t do them alone-true. But God has never asked us to go out into the world and do incredible, impossible things alone. Our faith & trust in Him is a sheer gift, because there will always be jobs too big for us. There will always be burdens too heavy for us to carry. If we take a leap of faith and put our trust in Him, we aren’t doing life alone anymore.
If you feel that your dreams are too big, give them to God. If you think your sin is too ugly, give it to God. And if you feel your life has baggage you can’t carry anymore, let God carry it for you. This is our sheer gift.